NOTE: Under Construction - I'm in the middle of upgrading my site and lots of stuff is kinda broken. Please forgive the mess.

Three Years to Stability

December 2020

Three years ago, I had a full blown manic episode. It landed me in the psych ward where I learned I've been living with undiagnosed bipolar 1 disorder my entire life.

The peak of mania was brief. Just a couple weeks. The depression that followed lasted years. It got so intense I started to make an attempt on my life. I wound up back in the psych ward on suicide watch.

After leaving the ward, I started an Intensive Outpatient Program to help deal with the depression. It lasted seven weeks. I thought it would cure me. That I wouldn't have suicidal thoughts any more. That wasn't the case. They were ever-present until earlier this year.

It's taken 36 med changes, a wonderful and amazing therapist, and the full run of the past three years, but, for the first time in my life, I'm stable.

It's been a hell of a slog. I almost lost, but didn't. So, I'm absolutely taking it as a win.

(P.S. In an effort to help reduce the stigma of talking about it, I've very open about my mental health. If you have questions, feel free to ask me anything either in public or private.)

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